late night thoughts....

So, its 1:15am... just three and a half hours shy of my third full day in Canada... and my head is still spinning! My room is what happens if I were to stuff all my worldly possessions and paperwork into an active volcano that would blow up and randomly disperse all my things in the confines of a room!
I'm writing what I'm about to write more to clear my head and also to keep myself from repeating myself to wellwisher who asks how I'm doing and how my trip was. Repeating something (even to those close to me) seems to devalue its importance to me... and thats not something I want happening.
So... to answer the question... "How was my trip to India?" I'd have to say that it was an emotional rollercoaster that has tugged on every string and has left me battered yet somehow stronger.
My cousin's wedding was awesome... for those of you who haven't experienced an Indian Punjabi wedding in India, I recommend seeing "Monsoon Wedding". It wasn't quite the same but a lot of dancing, drinking and eating nonetheless. It was great to catch up with my family, including folks from Australia, England, Iran and the US. I put on quite a few pounds... ahh... glorious butter chicken and daal makhani!
My time with my grandma in Dehra-Dun was also excellent and also involved more eating and philosophical chats under the lazy afternoon Doon sun. The reality of the limitations and decline of this human body were strongly seen, felt and acknowledged, and after a brief "poor me" episode... I've realized that I'm the lucky one to have seen and shared this time and experience with someone so close to me. Once again, I've RE-learnt to enjoy life.
Visiting one of our WorldVision sponsored kids in North Delhi was another great highlight. Smelling, feeling and walking near the visible monstrosity of the Delhi garbage dump which was filled with men, women and children digging for scrap metal and plastic to sell... with some even living in houses (if u can call them that) with rats, garbage bags and styrofoam for walls IN the dump definitely made me appreciate the opportunities I've been given in life. On an important note... Having seen and questioned the validity and use of money of this program, I HIGHLY recommend supporting atleast this particular project of WorldVision ... and NO, they do NOT actively or passively recruit for any church of any denomination... I'll try and post something a lil' more substantial later).Once again, I RE-learnt the importance of gratitude and sharing.
Javed's untimely death is something I'm still dealing with. I know that I don't miss HIM. Let me explain,I miss the image of Javed that I have.The massive man whose deep booming voice made many quiver but only till they realised that he was as threatening as a large teddy bear with a heart of gold. Definitely cliche but thats the image I have.His image is what he meant to me.Missing him is a very egotistical thing as I (and many I know) am the one who is in loss.Missing him forces me to re-learn the necessity to live life to the max.
My grandma's (again in Dehra-Dun) cataract surgery was a success but yet it has made me re-learn the importance of not taking anything for granted (especially when most of my limbs etc are fully functional... still not sure about that ball that lies precariously above my neck!).
My plane journey home was another major lesson.A few hours into the 15 hour flight, there was a PA call for a doctor or nurse. Coincidentally, I happened to be in the galley that separates first class from sardines-in-a-can class.A woman about my age came through the first class curtains and into the galley with her head in her hands and was obviously crying hysterically.Shocked... I backed into sardine-class as I heard a number of people, over the loud engine noise, who were obviously dealing with a critical situation on the other side of the first class curtain. There was a very obvious tense feeling in the air... and all I could do was offer a prayer for what was later confirmed (when I met the doc at the luggage carousel as a departed soul. I can't even imagine sitting next to my deceased parent for 10+ hours.Once again, I RE-learnt the fragility of life.
The biggest thing I've RE-learnt is that my ego and myself need to work on putting into practice everything I've learnt... forgotten... re-learnt and fight the human habit to continue this vicious cycle. And even for this cycle, I'm grateful. :)
Buenos Noches all! I won't apologize for rambling... u coulda stopped reading after the first paragraph! ;)
Love, Laugh... and Live!